Procrastinating

Waaaahhh!!!! Here I go again!

I just hate this bad habit. Procrastinating. It’s my personal murderer. Much as my Passion fuels me, procrastination just always has a way of messing things.

But that statement is wrong. I do not have passion on what I am doing. Had I been doing what I really love to do, had these work been more of fragile steps towards my dream, no way can procrastination kill my spirit. But who wants to form DFD’s? If my future is to become stucked in an office and pitifully sitting in front of a computer, then I would rather procrastinate and try fueling my self with enough interest (if that can happen) before I start. I am the one that kills me, and I only use procrastination to do it. In short, I allow me to kill myself.

I wish I were somewhere else studying design. I wish I were holding these colorful fabrics and looking into houses and thinking of an ideal plan to make it look more cozy and home-like. I want to be someone who makes other people smile by letting their own homes and workspaces put up that smile on their faces. I want to be remembered not by my effort but my burning passion.

I want to be somewhere else, but I am stucked here studying what I never want to study afterall. And it just feels like hell.

I would want to leave while there is still time. But no one would let me.

I just wonder, why do I listen to them? Are they me?

Oh well, panaginip.